Hi Everyone!!!
So here's what's happened since our last post.
We had Cudo checked over by my vet and decided to inject his hocks. It couldn't hurt and in true Cudo fashion, the simplest thing has helped. He had 10 days off, because let's face it, he's plenty fit and already knows how to jump and we had him pulsed twice to help work those sore muscles out a bit. His poll is improved massively since February and he's physically in much better muscle shape than he's been before. I think the strength work is paying off and I like where we're headed.
On this past Sunday I took him to our local indoor to school some bigger fences in preparation for the show this weekend. He was a star and we played with up to 1.35 stuff. Not a ton mind you, just enough to flex the big jump muscles and be ready to face our 1.20-1.25 division stuff.
Video of a bit of that school is here: https://youtu.be/fuFmfFolP-I
Thursday morning we shipped up to the American Gold Cup show early knowing we would be competing around noon time. It's a 4 hour ride but it was longer thanks to some bridge traffic. Bear with me as my retelling involves hindsight and I think that what I know now colors how I am looking back on the events. First off, this is a BIG DEAL show. The big names were there and I was in quiet a 'big' atmosphere. I don't think I am used to it yet and I can feel myself feel more than a bit like an outsider looking in, and not quite feeling like I belong. Did I mention that I want to see a sports psychologist? That is getting fast tracked now. :)
An amazing thing that happened right off was when the stable manager told me, when I went to check in for our stall, that he was "going to make my weekend" and oh did he. He put us in the one permanent barn on the place, not a tent, with a gorgeous 14x14 stall stabled next to Georgina Bloomberg and with some other really nice outfits. An added benefit to this is that we were the only barn on the grounds that could turn off the lights at night so Cudo enjoyed a LOT of sleeping at this show. I was so grateful and awed. And the other people in the barn were so very kind to me. They I think respected that I was a 1 man band who really did do it all for my horse.
So we're there, he's in his palace and we have a couple hours to get where we need to be. I go watch some rounds and then walk the course and it looked good to me. I had time so I got down to the collecting ring with time to warm up. And that's when I notice some strange things. Cudo is spooking, a lot, at little things. Guys who come into the collecting ring and pick up any poop as it happens, horses passing the other way, random extra jumps stored off to the side. And he's jumping but he's not taking me to the jumps like normal. Ok so my first thought is the drive may have worn him out. And due to a storm he was in the whole night as well instead of being out like normal. So I am wondering if he's stiff. But time is elapsing and I have to go in the ring. So we go in.
I thought I had a good pace starting off but hindsight shows we didn't. It was backward. I had mentally prepped myself to really try to get my distances a bit better at this show. Why? Because though I have been getting them mostly I blamed my lack of staying on top of knowing what each line should be for the rail at the team championships and the stop at the mini prix. I want to fix those issues so before I got on I knew all the distances for this class. What I failed to think about/ fix was what happened when the distance you're supposed to have isn't there because you didn't ride right. Ugh. We rode from fence 1 to 2 and as we were at 5 strides I could see that that the 7 it was supposed to be wasn't happening. I pulled, then 8 didn't happen, and I pulled again as Cudo informed me that if you pull that much I am stopping. And stop we did. So I circled and he cleared it no problem. You'd think I would then get out of my head right here and put some petrol in the tank....but no. We went to the next line, fence 3, 6 strides to 4AB. And there I got a 7 and a 2 in a 1 stride, taking down both elements of the in and out. At that point I got mad (at myself) and kicked our butts into gear. But by then there was damage done. I was having to convince Cudo to go jump the damn fences. He wasn't stopping but he was clearly without a lot of his typical confidence.
You can see the round here: https://youtu.be/dCpQV0k5noc
So we walked out of the ring and I was proud because I had gotten him around even though he was clearly upset. But I was equally upset and kicking myself for riding that poorly at this show. I mean at any show that round would suck but McLain Ward had just walked by and there was Rodrigo Pessoa schooling someone in warm up. It was just a "Oh lord let me dig a hole and bury myself in it" moment.
I did do some right things that day though. I saw that there was some open schooling classes in the adjacent ring and I added us into a 1.15 round for the next day. The timing wouldn't be perfect as it would be after my division class the next morning but hey, I knew he needed a lower round to grab some confidence back and whether it was before or after the other round we were going to go do it.
So Friday came and with it a ring full of jumps for the Power and Speed class. I don't know if I liked that course better or not all I remember thinking was that ever oxer was really full sized. Not surprising but when you see a ring full of them, well I might have gulped a bit. Additionally part of me wishes I'd paid more attention to the follies of the day before. I got to the collecting ring earlier and in hindsight that was a mistake. Lauren, who I bought him from, has described to me repeatedly that he likes a short warm up with very few jumps. So I am there at least 35 mins before my time and with me are almost all 40 entries in the class. And Cudo is HATING all the horses around him. Then it gets worse, right as he jumps a warm up oxer some girl trots into our landing area about 2 strides after the jump and we nearly broadside them. He is greatly upset by this. So much so that he's now nearly stopping, and so we switch to a vertical off the other direction and then he does start stopping. We're mins away at this point from going in the ring and my friend who's helping me and I have a healthy debate, do we scratch him or not? I was able to get him over the vertical and my thought is that on course he's typically very professional, it's the warm up that's bugging him. So we decide to try. We stroll into the ring and I say a couple prayers and try not to think about the enormous oxers that are waiting for me. In my mind I have all the facebook feedback from the day before and it's becoming clear that a sports psychologist would be a great idea. I kick off to the first and am gleeful as he sails over it. Then we loop back to #2, and I am relaxed as it's just a vertical. Well....to Cudo it wasn't 'just a vertical' it was in some way worth stopping at. UGH (*^&^#)(()*YY&*^%$$)!!!! SH**!!!! So I know I am not eligible for the speed with a stop so I compose ourselves and get him going back to it. This time I am ready to go and screw it, we are GOING!!! We miraculously make it around but I would very much like to get to digging that hole and hiding in it at this point. But it is better than yesterday's round with a stop and two rails, so progress is being made.
Video is here: https://youtu.be/0927hCUiXSQ
But I am thrilled I entered him in the 1.15 because I know he really needs it and even better we have a plan. We have a great simple course and no one in the warm up area. It's only 15 mins after the other class so I do a very light warm up, jump 2 verticals and go. And within 2 fences I have my horse back. The ears are pricking instead of cocking back and he's feeling good. I am happy and we're hitting all the fences in stride. I could care less where I am and I am talking to him praising and petting him as we're going. He finishes nicely and is clearly beaming full of confidence again. I am thinking that maybe I don't need the hole just yet!!!
Video of the round is here: https://youtu.be/8jGzjR1CQDc
So we're done and bored by 11:30 and we find a bar that's open at the show so I bask in a half of a bloody mary. This is the hard part because now I am over thinking. I go watch the grand prix that afternoon and I am feeling a bit better when rails and stops happen to the good riders. I am starting to realize that this is the game. That all these things happen to everyone at all levels and though I am winging it alone, all these other folks who spent 6 figures+ and have 2 trainers also have crap days. And they spent WAY more on their crap days than I did. LOL
So Saturday dawns and we have to wait for our class. It is going off at 1:15 and my ride time is around 3:30. 51 horses in the class and I am determined not to go down without a fight. We have improved each round and damnit I want to be better than the round before. I did get up early and left everyone behind at the hotel as I went to the barn to do morning chores and feed Cudo. He is looking well, has clearly slept a TON given how his sheet is covered entirely with shavings, on both sides and even better he's playing with me and nudging me for cookies. I will admit that in the 20 minute ride from the hotel I was crying to the music playing from my "get pumped" playlist. Not sad tears but rather the GET UP OFF YOUR ARSE AND SHOW THEM YOU ARE a force for the future. I wanted to ride better at such a great venue and I feel like I let the atmosphere go against me rather than to encourage me to rise to the occasion. (Sports psychologist...ASAP)
We made a new plan at dinner the night before and we cemented it when we went to walk the course. The ring where he did his 1.15 class is empty and there are now 2 collecting ring areas we can use. We are going to keep him as alone as possible in the other collecting ring and not going to jump any big oxers (in terms of height) in the warm up. We will jump overly wide oxers, but not high. We will jump a high vertical. Goal is only 5 warm up jumps and we're not getting him started at all before we are 5 away from going. So fast and quick warm up with the goal of getting him as ready as he likes. And it worked!!!
No spooking, no issues and he goes into the ring eyes bright and ears pricked. I have watched 17 rounds between the Juniors and the early part of my class. I LOVE the course. I mean I could feel my mojo as I watched and walked it. And I have a game plan and we know where to do what. He's good galloping down to the oxer at #1 and sails over it clearing by multiple inches, We do the turn to number 2 and I accelerate as planned as the time has been running very tight. Up and over fence 2 on the first try! (First time this weekend at this height) and we ride to #3 and I nip the reins a touch (I think) and he drops the front rail. I am bummed but determined to ride as well as I can over the whole course. 4 comes up a hair short but he jumps around. We do the rollback to #5 which while it rides easy is a pretty good sized 1.25 oxer. I knew that already but Cudo made the decision to give it some extra room because when we landed I was acutely aware that more gravity was involved than just a 4'1 oxer would merit. Pics confirm he added about 5" to it. LOL. It was 8 strides to a 2 stride on the outside rail and I asked him to step up a bit, but in so doing realized his monster stride was going to get us too close to 6A. So I kind of waited a hair and we ballooned up and over it, but it actually made the 2 stride more rideable. Around the turn at the in gate end of the ring to the liverpool vertical and I was shortening my reins and for a second got my whip stuck out so we had a slight unintentional left to right leg yield, so we angled that jump. Down to a big oxer and I guess I was thinking I was at Aachen and my knee pinched and I proceeded to get my spur stuck briefly in my stirrup with it sticking him in the side through takeoff. Whoops. Sorry bud. Then we had a vertical on a slight bend and around the turn to a line on the outside rail. I managed to get the 5 strides and rode through the 1 stride well. One vertical to go, the same one he stopped at the day before, and I thought I felt him eyeball it but I growled at him and he sailed it. We finished with 1 rail, INSIDE the time by under a second and change and I couldn't have been prouder. He came out and showed up and did a fantastic job. We finished 34th out of 50 horses, which was just in the top 2/3rds of the class. I was just thrilled that we didn't bring home a cricket score!
The sad part is the video of this round may have been lost/corrupted. As we speak the video company is trying to fix things. I haven't heard much but I am hoping against hope that we can get to see it. I know I need to see the ride and I want to see the things he did underneath me. So our fingers are crossed.
Summary: I am beyond thrilled with my horse and honestly myself. We got kicked around a bit and had to really figure things out. This time it was Cudo asking me for confidence and not the other way around. I love that he trusted me enough to go when I told him "I believe in you, you can do this." I do think it's important to go face the really good riders who compete at this level weekly and see where we measure up. And I did so intentionally on the edge of winter so I could start to think about what I want to improve on and how and who to get some education from as we look to 2019's season and an eventual return to face the big boys and girls again in June or so to once again see how we match up.
I know more than ever that he's the horse of (10) lifetimes. He's beyond amazing even on a sucky day and I am still so grateful for all the H&H forum help I received that eventually led to him coming to be mine.
I thank anyone who has read all this. LOL. Sorry I had a lot to say I guess. But this thread is very cathartic for me as well.
I will post pics on Cudo's Facebook page here soon.
Hope you have a great rest of the Sunday.
~Emily
